Take The Long Way Home...

[Redo]

FOBD: I have not followed your sitch from the very begining, but have for the most part. I am so sorry you are in this position.

My Wife left for 6 months in 2009, with our daughter. Then she came back. But a completely different person. More angry, constantly resentful etc. Looking back in 2010, she asked me to do a lot of things which i did (financially). I had no clue that she was all along planning to file for divorce in 2011. She filed for it in Jan. And from then on she has proceeded at a constant pace, carefully making sure that she gets what she wants like in a business deal.

So take it from a guy who has been on this hell road for a while. Don't take the filing for divorce as the end of the road. It is not. A million things can change from now till it is final. I would say even after the divorce is final, it does not mean anything. In my case i think my wife will come out of her fog only when the divorce is finalized. Sometimes i believe a WAW needs that finality that realize that they have thrown away a good thing in their lives.

As others have suggested, i would say:

1: Dont be proactive toward this D. Be reactive. Which means that if she wants info, take time and give it. If you dont she will build resentment. But you have to convey that D is NOT how you would have approached.

2: Be strong. During the process of D, lots of sensitive topics may come up. Be the rock here. If she vents, validate, but also let her know that this was her choice. Not yours.