Casa Bonita...being in that place for any time would make me want to take a walk regardless. LOL

There is a lot to digest from your situation. I'm sure you've gone over it 1000 times.

I would say I'd drop the idea that the OM took advantage of her when talking to her. You know it, I know it, he knows it. No need to say anything more about it. The issues are wholly between you and her, now. She isn't that person any more and you aren't the person who drove her away either.

As far as moving forward, I say that your only "plan" is to continue to work on yourself. you might have a fantasy on what your M could look like, but that that is more for you and your goals.

You are in this process together now, you two will only be able to move forward if both of you are moving. This will require a lot of work on both parts. And it's not easy or pretty. but the rewards can be great.

Good luck on the MC. I hope you found a good one. They can help facilitate the recon process, but shouldn't direct it. I will say that I believe ours helped tremendously. After 4 months, he "fired" us. He said that we don't need him anymore.

Feel free to join us in piecing if you feel the need.

Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.
--Jean Jacques Rousseau.