Please remember this is your loss too......you do say it, please listen to yourself.
Originally Posted By: goodattitudegirl
I've been pinballing like crazy since X-MIL passed away.
I am grieving her passing and also what I fear could be the end of my DB'ing. I know intellectually that fearing the latter is stupid because I can't predict the future, but I am struggling with this right now.
my X-MIL just passed and I am thinking about my R with XH. That feels SO inappropriate. Ugh!!!! I'm sick of myself.) All of this introspection led to an insight this morning........
No 2x4's......just a gentle hug to be given today along with a reminder that any "insight" you might think you have is seriously affected by the emotions you are feeling right now.
While I like what you wrote to your XH, now is not the time to dance around observations and analyzations of who he is, how he was, and anything else like that.
Just your "presence" and help will be more than enough for right now.
You are "Spinning" as we like to say sometimes when we are describing our wayward MLC spouses and X-spouses.
You get a "hall pass" on the spinning thing......
however you will not get a hall pass on acting like an MLCer during this time.....I will be as gentle as I can be while being firm with you.......
You are one smart lady........you know better.......try to remove yourself from everything right now and just focus on the situation at hand......
1) You are grieving 2) Your XH is grieving 3) Be "Present" in your support of your XH and his family for now.
Come here, journal, vent, whatever but stop trying to figure out the long range implications of your X-MIL passing.
You will make yourself "Crazy".
Remember the constant in everyone's sitch????????
TIME
There will be time for you to think about things later......
avoid making decisions now........
Especially this one VVVVVVVVV
Originally Posted By: goodattitudegirl
what I fear could be the end of my DB'ing.
I will tell you that standing out here looking in at your situation..........
Things look pretty good as far as your R goes with your XH.
That is all your gonna get from me right now as it would be "inappropriate" for me or you to ponder anything else right now.
Remember you can't see the forest because of the trees right now........
If you move around too much you might get lost.
Again, so very sorry for your loss.
Take care, and may God Bless You.
~C
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
