A coworker recently finalized a messy D, he had moved out of the marital home. In court the judge ordered him to pay all the utility bills even though he didn't live there anymore.

IMO, if it's a bit of a struggle for you each month and he will pay the bills then let him. Take what you can now, for whatever his reason. Could even be his L is advising him to take care of the bills for his kids so he looks better in court. Which could make any settlement better for him. Check with your L about that.

Live your life while you are still living.
Riding the trail less traveled.