My Story - He Cheated while I was Pregnant

[AJM80]

H mentioned moving closer to the kids and I. Told his M and F he plans to break his lease when they were out here. Told me he needs to move somewhere cheaper and was considering up here, even though his commute would be longer.

I'm glad he cares about the kids and misses them. I wish he missed me - argh - I know he does, there's just more to adult vs parent relationships. He brought my bday gifts from the kids last week - got me a nice bag and a favorite food. He wasn't listening to me, though - the food was way off base and I'll sneak it to freezer for my nephew. The bag is nice, but not what I would have chosen - too brand oriented. I prefer simple/classic versus printed all over with the name. Do I return it or suck it up and use it to keep building a bond? Can I tactfully say you don't get my taste when I know he tried? The size/shape are great - and the sweetness was there.

What I've realized lately is that there are no winners in this situation (except maybe the kids). Even if you bust the divorce, you don't win. Sh-t still happened, someone you love still ripped you and your life apart, time, money, joy/fear/anger were all wasted for something that didn't have to happen. An affair never needs to happen. There's no excuse or justification for violating the person you love. But it does happen....all the time.....I guess the lesson my brain is absorbing on a deeper level is that life is hard, sh-t happens. People make mistakes, you forgive the people you love, and love gets you through it.

I really could use help on the purse thing. I don't want a big step backwards - H stayed 2 trains later and stayed up half the night looking at old pics and videos.