I am still feeling pretty low today. I am crying at the drop of a hat. With no contacat with her at all yesterday, I get a text first thing this morning asking if I have taken the papers to a lawyer yet. I asked her if she wanted me to be gone when she comes and see's the dogs. She said no, she wanted to show me how to use the sprinkler system. She then asked if I was going to see her parents today as she was going this afternoon. I told her yes and asked what time she was going...back and forth like this as she didn't quite understand what I was saying. Finaly, I got my meaning across that I was seeing them today and will go before she gets off from work.
Her texts today just seemed so cold. I probably shouldn't have done what I did, but at least I did it in a DB way...I wanted to know why she was so cold. So instead of stating that the texts sounded like that, I said I hope I'm misreading the resentment and hatred in your texts. She responded that I was and that ahe has no hate at all for me. She only wants the best for me and for me to be happy. I left it at that. But in my mind, I keep saying that if you really want that, come back to me and we can BOTH be happy.
I honestly didn't know divorces went this fast. It's been 5 weeks since she told me and I think the papers will be signed this week.
I have got to pull myself together. I need to be strong when she comes over tomorrow. I need to be my best and be positive. She needs to see the new me without the sadness.
