Basic Question

[AliSuddenly]

Hey Jack.. I'm not so sure... all this kind of keeps 'that' period alive and current, whereas, if you have succesfully pieced, maybe its time to relegate all this to the past? Be able to be yourself once again (with all that you have learnt).. not be second guessing or secretly setting goals etc.

In fact, H and I's relationship now bears little resemblance to the one we had before.. quite honestly the one we have now is more loving.. we never fight, I kind of see that as a symtom of lack of communication and since getting back together, one thing that is very different is we are mindful of the need to communicate. And by that I mean.. he is now trying hard to be more open and honest (rather than bottle things up and then bring them up a year and a half later!) and I work hard to always listen and by that I mean actively listen and take on board what he has said and make him feel heard.

I DB'd my *rse off for 18 months.. and yes, even when we got back together I was still Dbing looking back, being positive, GAL, laughing more, keeping up changes etc... 2 years on, I feel more relaxed and like that period is done. But then maybe thats because we did succesfully piece/marry and that helps me to feel relaxed and secure in the new R?

Nice to still see you here! I remember you were one of the guys that was a big help to me back in the dark days.