It's Time To Rock; Part II

[♪CS♪]

Denver, I agree that we need to adapt to our unique situations, I just wish that didn’t make it so much harder. If there was one “best” approach it would make it a lot easier, we wouldn’t have to question whether we are doing the right thing. I know I battle this a lot. But what I have decided to do is follow the advice of my DB coach, at least for now. I know this will not be over soon, so I always have a chance to change course. That is what makes all of the different opinions here so valuable.

This is all your perception of her thoughts. Did she tell you this? NO? then you don't know.

I don’t think it is a perception of her thoughts; it is my perception of her actions. Not filing for D, contacting me, joking around with me, etc. You are absolutely right that when it comes down to it, IDK. But, I also have to be aware of her actions, and how that might affect my sitch.

Man or Woman, it doesn't matter. Having two people interested in you makes you feels good. It's exciting.

Removing yourself from the equation takes away their excitement.

I see this point.

What have you done differently that your W would notice you?
How is your mood when you exchange your D?

I think a big thing IS the way I have treated her through this. I noted this before, when she left, she was scared. Scared of my anger and how far I might take it. Being friendly and not showing any anger towards her has been a BIG 180 for me, and she has noticed. She mentioned it.

I think it is important to think about why our W’s left. In our situation a lot was due to my anger and my controlling nature. I was unfortunately not the most caring H. I was usually more interested in getting what I wanted, and her be damned. That is why I feel this 180 is important for me. By having friendly interactions I am showing that I have regained control over my anger. By not always ignoring her I am showing that I do care about her, I do care what she wants. For me, ignoring her is exactly what I did throughout our M.

I have been able to keep a positive and upbeat mood during our interactions. Just a side note, our exchanges of D are typically a drop off and then pick up of daycare, so face time for us is not frequent.

I agree, Friendship is the foundation for a good R.

I agree 100%



I really appreciate your participation in my thread gr8. I know I have not always followed your advice, but that does not mean I am no listening or do not appreciate it. I am simply trying to merge all of the different information into something that I believe will work for me. All of the opinions I receive are critical in forming that decision.