Wow...My W just called me just to talk I think. It was wierd. She seemed to be in a good mode (as was I). A customer came into her office shortly after she called and it was over just as quick as it began.
I go get our taxes done tonight. I made it so she doesn't have to go with me, she can just come by and sign later.
Small things like her phone calls go a long way in my resolve.
M: 48, H: 42 Kids: 0 T: 20 yrs M: 16 yrs. (H's 1st, my 2nd) WAS/MLC: 12/7/09-I'm not the wife HE deserved Came home per L: 12/26/09, Left again: 2/6/10 Served: 10/21/10, D FINAL: 6/15/11
Alright...I went to see the tax people yesterday to get our taxes done. I needed some banking information so I text my W. She responded with the information and said I hope we don't have to pay because I'm strapped. This was after giving her $20K. I finished up at the tax place and text her that she need to go sign before they can send it, that the return will be put in her account, and that I paid the fee ($220) so the bank wouldn't charge $50 to pay it out of the return.
After leaving I wondered if her telling me she was strapped was a tiny cry for help. So I text her and said "since you are strapped, do you need anything?". She responded that she knew it would be tough money wise. And explained where all the money went. I told her that I would always be there for her financially if she needs it. She text back that she could not use me like that, it's not right but she does appreciate it. I left it at that.
A tiny part of me is a little bit glad she is strapped. This is her choice. The rest of me wants to make sure she is taken care of. I know that is no longer my duty, but it's still in my heart. I am ok with our text conversation and know I was positive throughout. I don't feel I pursued by offering since I did it only once.
I know today is going to be a great day because that is what I want to make of it! Going bowling tonight..we are in first place with 3 weeks to go.
My W just emailed me telling me that she was going to the hockey game with the girl who gave me her ticket to the same game. That kinda S*CKS. Well, she is going to see me socialize with the two women that we have been talking to the past few weeks. We (my buddy and another friend-female; both are friends with W) are also going out with the girls after the game).
She also said she wants to come over this weekend to see the dogs. That I can handle. She will get to see me (it has been over a week) and can continue to see changes I am making.
She changed her signature for her work emails. I wonder if she emailed me so I would see it instead of texting. It is her first, middle initial, maiden, then my last name. Thanks W...thanks a lot!
Regardless, I am not going to let this bother me. This is my day.
Brian - keep up the good work and stay focused. I am inspired by how far you've come. Remember, regardless of what happensn in the end, YOU will be a better person.
Each and every day I will continue to know and represent myself in the best way possible.
(Show your W what she is missing out on!)
BITS
M: 48, H: 42 Kids: 0 T: 20 yrs M: 16 yrs. (H's 1st, my 2nd) WAS/MLC: 12/7/09-I'm not the wife HE deserved Came home per L: 12/26/09, Left again: 2/6/10 Served: 10/21/10, D FINAL: 6/15/11
M: 48, H: 42 Kids: 0 T: 20 yrs M: 16 yrs. (H's 1st, my 2nd) WAS/MLC: 12/7/09-I'm not the wife HE deserved Came home per L: 12/26/09, Left again: 2/6/10 Served: 10/21/10, D FINAL: 6/15/11
Glad you love the mantra. Now go and post it all over your house and say it every day more than once! I'm totally serious. It keeps you not only on course but..well...zen!! ;-)
BITS
M: 48, H: 42 Kids: 0 T: 20 yrs M: 16 yrs. (H's 1st, my 2nd) WAS/MLC: 12/7/09-I'm not the wife HE deserved Came home per L: 12/26/09, Left again: 2/6/10 Served: 10/21/10, D FINAL: 6/15/11
She keeps texting me today...at first, it was just to say she is going to sign the tax forms (why tell me?)..Then it was about when I am going to see her parents (I guess so she could give me my truck key). I told her she can give it to me this weekend.
I choose to look at this as a positive. Maybe she didn't like the day we had zero contact at all. Maybe she is missing me. Regardless, I still won't initiate contact with her...She can come to me!!
