Who knows, when emotions come to play everything goes to pot.
You're angry about all this right? I mean, you do have anger correct?
Use your anger as your shield, not as your sword.
By this I mean, do not lash out at her with your anger, Do not let speak for you do not call her names or play stupid games or make her pay...that would be a sword.
But a shield? Who knows, when emotions come to play everything goes to pot.
You can use your anger to crush your emotional responses, so that logic and your goals are at the fore front.
From your other post:
Quote:
I say to her, whats going on but she doesnt come in any further.
And she gets on the defensive immediately. Her: " Why is there a problem?'"
It is soo easy to see our side in this. It really is. When YOU are interacting with her, or are planning on it, you have a plan, a list of things you have mild expectations of happening and more than likely have a loose flow chart list of your possible responses. I am pretty sure we all do...some sort of plan of how your day is going to go.
What is harder to realize is that everyone does this, including your wife.
She opened the door but didn't come in.
Seems like a plan of sorts for her, she wasn't going to come in. Perhaps she expected you to question it? Maybe she was upset that you didn't because she wanted an argument.
Flow chart drop down...defensive?
Mind reading? More like supposistion. Ultimately it doesn't matter why she does what she does, what does matter is how you react.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
