Oh I so understand your meaning about the finality of the divorce making the grief feel different and out of body. For me it really pushed me into a sort of "go into the new life as a single woman and conquer it", get things done, do work on my house and yard, start reclaiming my hobbies, get me back, that sort of thing. I had a moment in my yard at night at my firepit where I looked around and said "you know what? none of it is different. He's just not part of this anymore. But I thought him leaving would change everything around me and frankly, it really didn't. It just changed me."
So that was comforting, I guess, but in the past week I've felt like the old pre-divorced pining for him depressed woman that I was. So I think that's all just cycling through the stages of grief.
If you're in this sort of "odd" dimension now, it may be a way you are experiencing shock again at the change, which is numbing you to things, but in a way that's good. You can deal with it all in good time.
Right now just enjoy your family :-)
M45 Bomb 6/09; EA 6/10; Divorced 1/11 Proud single mom of 7 little feline girls and one little feline boy "Fall down 53 times. Get up 54." -- Zen saying
