It's Time To Rock; Part II

[♪CS♪]

Still and Busting, thank you for your thoughts. This is a great place to let it all hang out. I am not sure I would be able to cope without a good release mechanism like this place. Beyond that, it can just be amazing to see the support that so many people here give and get. Truly a lifesaver for all of us.

That is a tough question to answer 9. I guess in reality I actually do not consider what I am doing as “being friends.” I know I have said this before, but I look at it as simply being friendly. I am not taking her to a ball game or pricking my finger and pressing it against hers or anything.

To get more to your point though, I think part of it for me is what my relationship was always like with my W. We always were very good friends. We share a very similar sense of humor and we enjoyed just hanging out together. I just like her I guess. Don’t get me wrong, it can be very hard. I think of what she is doing sometimes and I want to punch a wall, but this is also one of my demons I am working on. One of my biggest 180’s through all of this is getting control of my anger issues. Overall, I have come a long ways. I think by being friendly towards her in this time is absolutely shocking for her. When she first left she was afraid of me. She thought I would hurt her. This was a HUGE wakeup call for me. I never realized how much my anger scared her. I couldn’t believe that she actually felt I would hurt her. It just showed me how bad it actually was. So, long story short, I think it is important in my case to show her this.