Are you totally sure the ow doesn't know about you and YOUR H dating?
I understand you wanting her out of the picture altogether and though no one could be sure, it seems like your H is headed in that direction.
I understand the tightrope you're walking. You've told your H your boundary, he knows it. It sounds as if he's processing it all. Step back, don't pressure, be patient. It'll all work out just as it's supposed to for BOTH of you. Have faith.
If you want a recon. with your H, keep showing him that you're the better option. You are you know, and always have been.
