Observations from the House of Zen......

[zengypsy]

When I watched Heavy this week, the girl on the show had gotten up to over 400 and she was 36 years old. She had been sexually abused from when she was 6-12. She also was very active in theatre and was married for 2 years or so. Because of her weight, she had become completely dependent on her H and lost all interest in her hobbies and had no self-esteem.

At the end of 6 mos being in this weight loss facility, she lost 140 pounds and her confidence kept building the more weight she lost. And she kept saying, that she didn't know if her and her H were going to work out. She was starting to feel more independent, she was ready to go back into theatre etc.

At the end of the show it indicated that despite various efforts, her and her H decided to seperate.

I thought the moral of the story I got out of the show was similair to us LBS's. The more WE recognize our accountability, the more we choose to use DB'g as a way of life, the more confident we get, the stronger we get, the more independent we get. We keep moving in a postive forward direction. And by the time our WAS's realize that these changes are permanent, will we have closed the door?

As I have stated before, even after the D, I will not close the door on a relationship with my STXH. If he thinks he wants to be with me at some point in the future, I would have to evaluate that just as I would evaluate any realtionship I have; friendships, work etc. I only have one door and it is open ajar. Anyonce can walk through it, my STXH included.