I’m back. I don’t know what the future holds, but for the first time in all this drama I took control of this rollercoaster yesterday. It just does not make sense to me to buy this house from the bank for a third time.
We took a construction loan when we built it. After about 5 years we consumed the equity to finance a lifestyle. 15 years later the balance is just below the original construction loan amount. Now W wants me to refinance it all over to pay for her new life apart, and use most of my 401k to pay off the revolving debt we amassed. This isn’t going to happen.
What I will do is sell the house to pay debt. What debt is left W and I will split. She will get half of my 401k less half of her 401k. Out of that she will have to draw sufficient funds to pay off her half of the remaining debt. She’ll walk with the remaining 401k money, spousal support for 7 years, her car and whatever household items we split.
She won’t be destitute, but she will not have the down payment for a small house, no credit card debt and new car she thought I would finance from the equity in the house. All part of the fogged in fantasy she believes she deserves.
I love her. I still want a new R with her. We have always been stronger together than apart. She needs to realize what she stands to lose and what life will look like if she continues firm in her decision.
BITS Me 55, ACK, when did that happen? Doesn't feel like 55 D 30 S 27
You create your own universe as you go along - Winston Churchill
