Harrier, I promised I wouldn't hijack your thread so I'll try to keep this short. The similarities are scary. My W is doing ALL of this. The clothes she wears when meeting with her boss are her "look at me" clothes, tight everywhere - it's like a fashion runway. I should take photos. I feel physically ill b/c it's obvious none of this is for me. And I know when the boss isn't in - she wears pants or jeans like everyone else in the office. She lost weight and very concerned about it not coming back. I feel like I am competing, and losing also.
Does my W understand my anxiety? She know about anxiety from family members who have mental illness. She associates this with that.
Is W affectionate? When I am in DBing mode, ignoring whatever is happening - occasionally. I'm thankful for that. But if her BB is going off or I'm actually expressing something that's not 100% positive - no, she's turned off.
Would my W back down? I have no idea. W says she has never in our entire marriage felt the least bit of jealousy, maybe because I have always been very careful about avoiding any situation where there could be any doubt whatsoever. (I teach at a college - and was taught early on exactly how to avoid any chance of a misunderstanding). Or maybe she doesn't care as much. I dunno.
Well, not so short. Sorry H. Feel like I'm stuck in "in between" time, the time between seeing the something bad is inevitably going to happen and the time it actually happens.
