Look, I know it is upsetting to think she's trying to make up her mind between you or OM. However, I see it as her still seeing a possible future with you, whereas, she could have closed that thought a long time ago and not consider you at all.
Therefore, she needs to be seeing the best side of you right now. I don't think that's what you've shown her. Pull back and stop contacting her. If she sends some little TM that doesn't ask you a question....STOP FEELING YOU SHOULD RESPOND! Take it at face value.
For gosh sakes, leave the subject of the dog along. It is a pissy subject to just try to dig at her. It will not cause her to see what a fine man you are at this particular time. It makes you look petty by making her take the dog back. (That is what a woman would do.) You did say that the dog belonged to both of you, right? Leave it alone.
Do not ask her about reading books. Do not ask her about seeing a C. As long as she is emotionally affected by OM.....it will do no good whatsoever, and in fact, could backfire where you & M are concerned.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Listen to Sandi2 islander. She is very good and has great information. I didnt always listen to her and i wish I did. She doesnt sugar coat things and speaks from experience.
I think she is a frim believer that women want to see a strong man that is in control. Be that man.
BTW, Sandi2, if you are reading this , I would love some input from you. I mean what I say.
9 BITS
BITS M-46 W-42 M-16y T-19 y s10 s15 BombDec.19/09 Sep-F16/10 Sep Papers signed by W- June 30/10 Recon July 5/10 PA foundOut- Oct 30/10 Mental HospNov/10 moved out Nov/10 Leg Sep Mar 15/11
Islander AND Nine... you both need to be listening the advice that Sandi just gave. Both of you need to stop getting ahead of yourselves and be PATIENT. You've both made very positive progress... why do either of you want to even consider giving up now???
BIT Denver
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
Dont know Denver. Just want to avoid the next pull at the heartstrings. I think islander is in the same boat. But I guess at this point we have more to gain and less to lose. Meaning that we have had our hearts torn from us, shown to us at times and then thrown away.
I suppose islander we paid for the admission to this Greek Drama, may as well see how it plays out.
What other choice do we have? If we pull the plug now, it may signal the end of the show.
9 BITS
BITS M-46 W-42 M-16y T-19 y s10 s15 BombDec.19/09 Sep-F16/10 Sep Papers signed by W- June 30/10 Recon July 5/10 PA foundOut- Oct 30/10 Mental HospNov/10 moved out Nov/10 Leg Sep Mar 15/11
