Recovering after a same sex affair - Part 3

[sparks14]

I am just wondering why she is using your house as a hang out place?

it's like she is getting the best of both worlds...
you are making it too easy, in my opinion, to not have to deal with her decision to leave...since you really aren't having her leave.

Are you spending that much time at her house? I thought I read you hadn't been there yet

why is she then spending so much time at YOUR house?

it seems like you are sliding quite nicely into the role as really good friend/babysitter

is that where you want to be?

Thanks, Figg. She does not often "hangout" at my house. We have to meet there often to exchange our son. She never stays for more than an hour if that.

Due to our co-parenting, we are getting to a place where we want the other parent to have more access when the child is with the other parent. I want my W to feel comfortable coming to the house to assist in S bedtime routine. She wants to make her apartment accessible for me to come over for the same. It is very important for both of us to provide our 6 month old with both parents in this time of his development. I have read a ton where this is very important especially when the parents are separated. Some even believe that daily interaction with both parents is key, but that would be impossible if I support my W's needs for space and my detachment. We are just trying to do what we can here without pressure or smothering.

Last night, my W called concerning our sick S. He had been vomiting over and over again. She was in tears and very scared and asked that I come over. It was an odd moment when I had to ask my W where exactly she lived. I knew the apartment complex, but did not know which apartment.

I rushed over there. The two of us worked as a great team and took care of our sick boy. I spent a few hours over there. Before, she was not ready for me to go over there because she hadn't completely moved in. It was kind of a mess, very small, and just not an ideal situation. She is sleeping on an air mattress next to a portable crib for the baby.

I was very confident and upbeat while over there. W and I handled a difficult situation very well. She even offered me a beer and we sat and talked about non-R stuff. The two of us are on very friendly terms.

I think the good friend/babysitter is not exactly where we are. I do think it is very important that our S comes first as much as possible. I also think it is important for us to remain as friendly as possible. Am I allowing my W to have the best of both worlds? I don't think that is really happening.