It has been awhile since I last posted. Lots has happened and I need advice on what to do from this point.
A quick recap of events. Discovered ea through facebook in november. H said he would stop, but did not know if he wanted us to work out. Said he had been unhappy for two years and I was not supportive. A lot of history rewritingy. I freaked out cried begged, then got the db book and went to work. Things looked like they were back on track he was loving, etc but he started to drink heavily. Discovered in Feb he was still in contact with her. He down played it saying they were just friends. I confronted him with facebook pictures of them together and also the fake page he set up where he friended her brother. Also learned they had met up in NYC and his best friend spilled on everything my h had told him about ow. I told h he had to stop or move out. He said he would stop.
He brought up d again on Sunday. I tried to validate his feelings but stated that I didn't feel a divorce would make things easier. I also stated I felt it was drastic to go from being married living together to a divorce. He asked what I thought about separation and I again stated that is not what I want. I felt we deserved to try to work on our marriage when there was not a third person involved. He agreed we have had a good marriage for most of our 10 years together but didn't know if he could get back his feeling and desire to try. He then went to bed with no decisions made. He has not brought it up since. He actually asked me yesterday if there were other school districts I would consider moving to, as he has wanted to move for several years.
He is filled with so much anger right now, he goes out of his way to be a smart a%% at times. He started sleeping in the spare bedroom and shows no physical attention to me. This is so different from the past 2 months when I know now he was still involved with ow. Is this new behavior a result of ending the A. How long can it go on for? It angers me because he is the one who messed around and he is punishing me.
I have stopped calling him during the day, sayingI love you, and hugging and kissing him when he leaves for work. However, when I stopped is also when he pulled back even more.
What should I be doing at this point. He stated he turned to the ow because she was supportive and praised him, while I just nagged and tore him down. Ugg, I feel confused I don't know if pulling back so much is working but I don't want to persue.
