Cautiously Optimistic

[Queen_of_Swords]

Hey SC, you’re not running out of time, you have all the time in the world.

That's just not true. We have a limited amount of time on this earth and no one knows how long that is. I'm a middle aged woman with two kids to raise to adulthood. I don't have all the time in the world.


Don’t wait for him, what would you do differently if he did D today? Do it now, you don’t have to wait for him.

The only thing I'm not doing is dating other men and working full time at the moment. That and not doing things that I don't have money to do.

None of this will feel long, tiring or agonizing if you are doing it for YOU, so that is what you need to do. Put the M out of your head. Pretend like the D has gone through, now what would you be doing?

What I am doing now. Looking for full time work. Going out, being who I am without trying to please him or others.


There is a big difference between not hoping and not caring. You can still care. You can know that if he does end up with a change of heart you would still like to work on the M, but don’t “hope” it will happen.

I don't think I can continue to care about someone that has so little regard for me that I'm treated as a stranger. I don't expect him to change his mind or his heart. Not with those shark eyes.

He's rocking that baby called resentment and hanging on to it and feeding it IMO.

Detachment is preached here. Don't care, don't let the WAS ruffle your feathers, just continue on like they don't matter, don't let your feelings get the better of you.

I know all of this is easier said than done. I of course still have my bad days. Day’s where even though I know exactly what I should be doing, I still don’t do it. We just need to do the best we can. One foot in front of the other.