thanks kevc i have no concrete evidence its just my mind i think. and no i would never blow my top with her ive come to far to start that crap again. like i said in an earlier post i ask her to go away for the weekend and she said we could go to dinner or something but not the whole weekend as she has a history paper for college to do. i said ok and she text me a few hours later and ask if that made me mad that she had a history paper to do. i said nah u gotta pass in school. i really think that was a test and she is just waiting for me to blow up and control her again to justify her decision to divorce.