contact has been pretty regular and positive (even if we have only been talking about logistical stuff)
today i went to her house to go through some stuff in the garage to see what i would want to take. i had planned on trying to apologize for some stuff and one thing specifically...
(warning: jerk alert!lol) when we were together she would send me articles all the time in emails... stuff that she had read that she thought i might be interested in. i always complained about this for some stupid reason... i would say things like "stop sending me spam... i don't want to sort through all this stuff) when in reality obviously it wasn't much stuff.
she would always get angry but i never realized how rude it was of me to belittle her for THINKING ABOUT ME during the day (cringe)
so, after i had gone through some stuff and was about to leave i stopped and said, "i want to say... one thing that i feel REALLY bad about is how much crap i used to give you when you would send me stuff to read in emails." she smiled and nodded.
then i said, "so i just wanted to say... if you read something that you think i would be interested in i would really appreciate it if you would send it to me." when i said this her eyes instantly welled up and she was about to cry. i quickly headed to my truck and said "just let me know if you need anything, ok?" and she nodded... i left.
i'm really encouraged by her emotion. it shows me that she isn't gone and still has a lot of pain that she has to deal with and things that i do can maybe go a ways towards healing the wounds.
what do you guys think? (especially sandi) lol
BITS
M 11/11/00 Bomb end of September 2010 Filed 11/9/10
