Shine on you crazy diamond III

[FellOnBlackDays]

********************** EVENING UPDATE ************************
So, I headed down to the bar where we were all meeting. I was bit late and many were there already. W was not present. I was at the bar buying drinks when she walked in. We made eye contact and she walked over. I hugged her and gave her a kiss on the cheek. I asked if I could buy her a drink. She agreed. We carried our drinks over to the group. She parted and started greeting everyone. We had a large group and were spread over two tables. There was no room for her at the first table with the bride and groom. So, she just stood there. Don't really know what she was doing.

So, we made eye contact and she suddenly grabbed a chair and came sit next to me. We began talking and laughing. We were having a good time when I got called to the parking lot to assist another guest with some directions. I was pissed. They broke in on our good time and when I got back she had moved to another table. Dang it!!! But she was still there and I could still be with her, so I was happy for now.

Unfortunately, the wedding party decided that the girls wanted to go dancing and the guys wanted to stay where we were. Everyone agreed to separate. Dang it AGAIN!! But, I played it cool. The females all left she said nothing to me and just left. I was kind of deflated, but continued to have a good time.

About an hour later we all met back up at another bar. I was still drinking slowly to avoid drunkenness. She suddenly reappeared with my SIL. Awesome! We spent the next three hours dancing and hanging out as a group. When the situation would present itself, I would make conversation. But, I tried not to pursue or move closer to her when she would move away. We had a couple of really nice conversations. Nothing about the R or S, just having fun. At one point, she complimented me on my speech at the reception. She even cracked a couple of jokes with me. But, I could still tell there was some uneasiness in her actions. She is still not really comfortable around me. It was very obvious.

The night ended and she was leaving. I again asked her if I could walk her to her car. She agreed. I walked her and made small talk. At the car, I gave her a brief hug, told her goodnight and slipped in a kiss on the cheek. She drove away and I went off to a very late breakfast with the rest of the group.

Folks, I don't really know what all this really means. I am, however, going to chalk this up as a victory. I DB'ed, I had fun, I stayed sober and I showed her that life is going to go on without her. She is still carrying some anger. She did, at times yesterday, act like a jerk just to be one. But, she did see me having fun with and without her and I applied no pressure all day. We are still MILES and MILES from any kind of reconciliation, if there will even be one, but yesterday should could not have hurt my chances. No, she wasn't going to jump into my arms and ask me to take her back. But, we did spend a nice day together and I really enjoyed it. I am very happy tonight.

Maybe she saw something good yesterday that peaked her interest. I guess we will see. I will stay dark for a couple of days and maybe make some light contact later in the week.

Tonight, my mother told me she was disappointed that my W did show up. She felt like she should not have been there as it did, in the mind of some folks, take the focus off of the bride and groom. She also told me how proud she was of me for acting the way that I did and not letting my w ruin my day. I smiled and told her how much I loved her and not to worry about my w for now. But, tonight, I did notice that my younger sister has "de-friended" my W on FB...

I hope all my BITS are doing well tonight!!

FOBD