You were caught off guard. I didn't see you being a pushover.....just stunned. I think you could have told her that in the future she should contact you sooner to see about the child staying with you. After all, you have a life.....you have a schedule, you have to make arrangements, too. I can see where it looks like she took advantage of you. It's tough when it's your child involved.

This statement from W was the one that ticked you off:

Quote:
W: You have that frown on your face like you're mad about taking care of 'E'.


Don't "demand" an apology for something like that. Let it roll off your back. Those thoughts are hers, as crazy as they are.

She laid a guilt trip on you? I see her being the one who is guilty and setting you up to be the bad guy here. She's trying to shift her guilt over to you.

The statement that jumped out at me was this:

Quote:
W: You know this is your son, right. You're his father...


Has she ever made a remark like that before? I'm sure that was more of her pressure and guilt technique, but it was very inappropriate! IMHO, that should have been when you put a stop to the conversation and tell her she's out of line making a statement like that. However, that is the end of the conversation for you. It's not to get into further discussion.

It's important that she sees you standing tall, using a soft but firm, confident, manly voice. For example, "This conversation is over. Email me the arrangments about "E". Then you leave. No more talk. You have decided to end the conversation. If she keeps talking.....so be it, but you are not acknowledging it. See what I mean? You don't act like a jerk, but you act strong, take charge, attitude.

You see, she was controlling the entire situation. You needed to step up and be the man in charge and tell her what you will do.....not her telling you what you will do.

It's not right for her to pull the strings and dump the baby onto you whenever she needs a babysitter. I'm not suggesting that you refuse to keep him, but she needs to show more respect and consideration.

At the end of the day, only you know what you want, and you have to decide about the lines you draw in the sand.

((hugs))

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!