I don't want to play hard to get. I want a M that we both thrive in
That is your ultimate goal. But, you have to take steps to reach the goal.
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His 100% complaint about me was that I DID HAVE A LIFE outside of the M.
Unless you just totally ignored your M, then it sounds like an insecure man.
This is where DBing is confusing to a lot of newcomers. They say that GAL, (for example) was one of the complaints, so in turn they began to "smother" the WAS thinking they are showing more attention....doing what the S use to want. But as crazy as it may seem, you can't do that right now. Things have changed in your stitch.
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If I continue in my old ways, friends, outings etc...he will leave "nothing has changed
He will use any handy excuse he digs up. If he wants to leave, you can't stop that. Trying to be what you think he use to want from you is actually backfiring right now.
A WAS does not want any type of pursuing from the LBS. When you go about your life without having him as your main focus, then is sparks curiosity & interest from him. It takes little steps building up to the goal.
I understand not wanting to play hard to get from your own H....but human nature has not changed. Try it out and see.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
