Re-Bolt

[Bolt]

Keeping it going!
even though at times during the day, I would feel a little down, today was a positive one.

Yesterday, we got to have lunch together after a good morning conversation. We actually talked about how to talk to each other. We really started connecting on an emotional level. I'm seeing changes when that happens.

Then a neighbor came over and told me that her and my W had spoken to her a few days back and said she was "done". Now normally, I would have freaked out and gone off the deep end but instead I realized where I was, where my W was and knew it was just her venting. I did it to others in the past only to calm down and feel fine moments later.

So I left it at that. I went to lunch with W and had a very good time. More good conversation and lots of future talk. Shared a kiss goodbye and went on our way.

The end of the night, we went to buy a laptop for W and had a fun time with the family. Lots of little hugs and kisses the rest of the night.

The morning was spent just cuddling watching part of the world go to hell. We didn't have any in depth convos but we enjoyed our time.

Now here's something that I did that was suggested to me from a good friend. I backed off the affectionate advances. Usually, I would initiate the kiss and when I would leave her for the night, I would give a goodnight kiss. This time, I just let it be and you know what? She came to me. She seeked me out to just nuzzle her head in my chest (something I LOVE her to do) then she looked up at me and gave me a good kiss.

Now to top things off today...I had a ton of stuff to do and was REALLY GAL'ing it. BUT some of the stuff on my list was for my W. She called me THREE times throughout the day. The first was at 9am - she starts her shift at 7:00am. She says, "I was just thinking about you and wanted to see how you were doing."

Scratch that off the goal list! Then she calls me two other times just to see how I'm doing. I dig it.

I didn't want to pursue but I did say, "I've been thinking about you all day." in a text. She loves hearing that and knows it makes her feel good. She returns, "THat's just because you've been running all around town for me." I responded, "Yeah, but I like doing things for you."

And then left it at that. I wanted her to know I'm still here and still want her but didn't pursue and won't when she comes home.

Now, I come to this board, not to vent but to get out my good feelings so I am not too high. I like a steadier even keel...I get more stuff done and feel more productive.

That other stuff? Sex, closer emotional connections...they're on their way but in the mean time, I like this feeling and want to keep it going.