With yours and TG's post there is great wisdom and opportunity for me to learn and grow, and there is also considerable discomfort.
Part of the challenge is my wife's love languages are equally Quality Time Together and Physical Touch.
Being in another country, unable to cross the border without wife signing immigration papers, and then on the slim chance she even agrees to petition for me to come back into the country, it will still be another 2 or 3 months after that that I can even come and visit her.
I simply cannot meet her deepest needs and desires at the moment, and I know how much she wants that with a man.
That is why nothing less than my best is going to work here.
I must somehow dispel her beliefs long enough to attract her to come and visit me here in Canada, or even some other country for vacation, if she won't bring me back home to her in the US.
I think the best part of your post is that it is reminding me to slow way down.
I am in this for the long haul, and it's definitely a long road ahead no matter which way I look.
Good news I know I am committed, I know I'm not signing the divorce papers until my wife talks to our DB coach as she has promised, I believe she will keep her promise, and my DB coach is a gift from God.
Right now I am not so much working on being in busting mode, as I am cultivating Zen mode.
Just being fully present and aware. Focusing more on the things I am seeing and hearing as they are happening, rather than as I am projecting or expecting them to happen.
I am more focused and finding more enjoyment in doing the tasks at hand, and that is a solid start.
I am being the possibility of:
1) Integrity 2) Loving myself completely. 3) Things flowing naturally between us, without any fear or attachment to the outcome.
