Thanks to all of you for responding. All of you are right, and I know Satan is attacking me. He keeps attacking me harder and harder and I'm afraid I'm going to break snowmm.
Mr. Bond, nice to hear from you again. I don't want my children around them and that was actually a blessing when H didn't talk to them for all of those years to be honest. They are such bitter and evil people. Just afraid they have H brainwashed now. D14 just met them last year when H made up with them. And of course H didn't bother ever taking S20 anywhere or do anything with him because I think he feels like his family always did about my S20, he's not his responsibility and not blood so no need to bother. And S20 is hurting just as much if not more because XH turned to drugs, long long story and never came around to see S20 so H raised him. I just can't believe that H actually thought that SIL changed, and told me that himself and that she was his best friend now. She has not changed in the 16 years that I have known her.
A, I'm trying my best to hang in there. My H did this to D14, well, it will be 2 years ago in May. He dropped his rights to her, changed his number etc. He did this when he was found in contempt of court for not following the visitation days, not going to her counseling, and for drinking and driving with her in the car. But this was when he was in tight with his F and Step-mother. Now he's in tight with his mother and sister. It seems he always has to have someone (one of his extended families) in his life and on his side. Oh well. I just hate this ride so much. I'm sick of feeling nauseated from it.
Jon, I hope that you are so right that H didn't fake the good things and that he comes to his senses soon. The house is up for sale, and it's not only killing me but the kids also. As far as the spousal goes in my state, they changed the laws. So now you only get it until the D is final. And if the spouse was a stay at home W/H or M/F then you can get alimony for a few years until you can get training and a job. But I already work so I wouldn't qualify. The child support that I'm receiving I will continue to receive but it's not enough to live off of with the money I make. I am paying all of the bills, as a matter of fact the bank called me yesterday and told me that there is a hold on my account because the only bill H pays for is $50 a month towards the truck that was in both of our names and he drove it over 90 miles to the main credit union and dropped it off without telling me. So now my credit is ruined and I had to pay $100 yesterday in order for them to release my funds to companies that I pay for the bills. H hasn't made a payment they said since Jan. I called my L and he was going to call the credit union again but I told him not to bother because they will only tell him the same thing again. I'm responsible too because my name was on the loan. I still to this day don't know why the hell H did that, the first time I asked him he claimed he couldn't afford the gas (one big lie, wasn't even paying rent, was living with his father), then a few months later I asked and his answer was I don't know. UGH!
So since I don't have a number for him no one can call him regarding this loan. The only number I have is his father's so I did give it to the bank, but I don't even know if they are speaking. I told my lawyer he needs to contact H's lawyer and do something about this...tell H to call the bank with his new number or something and not to worry because I don't want his number.
My lawyer did respond to H's accusations of me and D14 by letter. And he told H's lawyer that he advised me not to have any contact with H or to let D14 have any contact either since he is only involved with D14 when it is convenient for him. And that also there will be no need for me to contact SIL and I don't even have her number in case of an emergency because she doesn't have our D14's best interest at heart. H should be getting letter today. So I don't have a choice no matter how you look at it as far as going dark.
Thanks again everyone for being here for me. It is so much appreciated, you will never know. I have put it all in God's hands the day H changed his phone number, the only problem is H has no clue that I'm standing for our M now.....I was so upset that when he told me that he wasn't coming home, I told him the door wasn't open for him anymore.
