Hi all -- Thanks for the visits Wonder, Jeannine, Rachael!
I'm skimming this book called "Excuse me, your life is waiting" -- it's essentially about how what you focus on expands...with a bit more detail than that I like the ideas in it but I find it sort of awkwardly written so I'm having a tough time getting through it...anyway...last week I started really focusing on the positives again -- posting them here, focusing my meditations on gratitude, talking back to negativity in my brain...
I feel calmer and more positive than I have in months.
I had the most wonderful weekend with h. From start to finish it was calm and loving and romantic and intimate. I felt so connected with him!
Friday, I came home from work to candles and champagne. We snuggled in bed and just talked...about romance...about his day, my day...probably even a bit about sports! He talked about the things that he finds romantic (candles, champagne, snuggling, hotel rooms, doing things together -- hiking, movies -- finding new places to eat, etc). A nice confirmation to doing "what works!".
We had dinner and movie plans -- tried out a really fun new chinese place but ended up bagging the movie -- we were too tired and COLD!
Saturday AM we went to the gym then came home and spent a few hours together -- let's just say we continued the romance of the night before! Saturday afternoon I went to a workshop "Yoga for Forgiveness" -- I'm going to make a separate post on it...essentially it was a series of journalling exercises to help one work on compassion and forgiveness. I found it EXTREMELY helpful...I focused on some issues with my MOM. The odd thing was that I was the ONLY person to show up! Yup! It was just me and the instructor for 3 hours -- totally weird!
Sat. night we hung out with h's friends from his last job to watch the Pats (yahoo!). Sunday we went to the gym then breakfast then ran some errands. We watched some football, went to the movies, then watched a bit more TV. When h woke up on Sunday morning he said "I'm so happy". I said "because the patriots won?" and he said "well...yah, that ... but other things, too".
Today h is spending the day at school...first doing some career counselling stuff, then studying, then back to classes! We've already got a date lined up for tomorrow.
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
Sage, I don't minimize for one moment the things you have to work through reguardless of how your H treats you now. You had the biggest blow a person can be dealt, and you can't get from A to Z without going through all the other letters first.
Your doing great in how your handling all this. Your working through it without putting your H on the defense thus shutting down communication all together.
You are an inspiration to me who thinks that there may be no hope for my M because I cannot get past the betrayal and lies and the way he seems not to be remorseful and he has not assured me that this OW will never be in our lives again.(he did twice,but it was lies)
She's been around for over 5 yrs. He has feelings for her no matter what he says. She has her hooks in deep and I don't think he can say no to her when she calls to talk.
I refuse to live in suspicion. He killed what we had when he caved and started the A and perpetuated it for so long.
Your H feels a great deal of remorse and is showing you such abundent love! He treats you like he is a man in love. You have a real chance of happiness with your H, and I think you will be one happy woman with him by your side. Rachael
I like the ideas in it but I find it sort of awkwardly written so I'm having a tough time getting through it...anyway...last week I started really focusing on the positives again -- posting them here, focusing my meditations on gratitude, talking back to negativity in my brain...
