Turned a corner

[gr8 day 2B alive]

I went in for a hug and he resisted, saying that he tried already this morning. He grabbed me and we had the best hug that I have had in a year. I felt safe again.

Should not have reached outt o hug him, You had him thinking then made it clear to him that he could have you back at anytime.
Be stronger.

He said that he keeps asking himself why I didn't make all the changes before he "checked out"? That confirmed to me he has noticed. He also said that he is afraid that if he doesn't move he will be letting himself down. I think he is embarrassed in front of his friends, if he doesn't move.

This is all WAS script here. So he's gonna allow his friends influence the most important decision of his life? And he doesn't want to let THEM down?

He went to take a shower and I was lying in bed (took a day off) we talked some more and I could tell he was getting agitated. I ended with "you do know I love you, I don't need you, I want you." He said he knows that. He said that I am very independent, self sufficient. He said that he hopes that I know he too loves me but but but.

Stop all the ILYs. You said it before. Say things once and that's it/.

On a side note...he did tell me where his new place is and how much he has been paying in rent. Our monthly housing expense is over 4,000 dollars. Can't he see that we can't do that???

Red flag, could he possibly have a room mate, AKA OW?

Now what, next steps?

Stop hugging him and being so attached to him.
Work on setting him free.
Take your car into service for yourself. SHOW him that you are an independent woman.

I know it's difficult right now for you. Make the hard decisions now so they pay off later.
gr8