Positively moving forward

[awest1217]

S did his first full weekend with H. It went alright. I don't like H dropping S off at church so maybe he will drop him off at the house from now on before church, but that gives him less time because I leave the house at 10 and he drops off at church at 10:50. It is just hard because being a sunday school teacher and the sunday school superintendent, I am very busy on Sunday mornings so it is hard to take the time to talk to H when S is dropped off.

S was happy to be back and he acted like he did when he first started visiting H every other weekend. S loves to be with H, but S isn't himself with H and so when he comes home it is rough on me. S doesn't eat like normal with H so when he comes home he eats a ton. Since he is going straight to church it is harder. Yesterday S would NOT go to his class because he didn't want to leave me so he came to my class and refused to do anything but sit on my lap or have me hold him. Then he kept saying he was hungry so he got a snack like the whole class, but was still hungry so he got more. Then S doesn't sleep normally with H (plus one of S's tubes fell out and he was saying his ear hurt so to be on teh safe side H and I decided to start his anitbiotic ear drops just in case it was infected and not just healing). Since S goes with H, he doesn't sleep like he does at home. S now will sleep on teh weekends until 7:30 and sometimes even 8, but with H he is up at 6:30 and doesn't go to sleep until between 9-10. I don't mind the staying up later, but since he won't sleep in like he does with me, it hurts him. S also won't take a longer nap. On my weekends, most Saturdays he sleeps for 3 hours at nap. With H it is barely 2. So yesterday we get home and S falls asleep for his nap and sleeps 5 hours. Was up for 2 then slept the rest of the night.

I know it will get better and I know this is all because S isn't comfortable with H and that will take time, but I am the one who has to deal with the bad parts. With daddy, it is all fun and games. Again, when S came home if I told him no he cried for daddy, which he hasn't done since we first started visitation. For S, daddy is fun and games with no responsibilities because H can do everything during the week since he doesn't have S so on the weekends he gets to just have fun, but with mommy, I only have the weekend to get stuff done so although I try to make it that we play most of the weekend, some of it is me doing work that has to get done. I know it will get better, but this weekend was hard. Mostly yesterday was hard because of S being so clingy. By the end of service he was back to normal in terms of not clinging, but it took a while for that to happen. We will figure something out hopefully to fix it.

Other news, I have a couple of guys who are interested in me. Nothing big right now and no one I could see being serious with, but one I talked to Saturday night for about 1 hour. Just getting to know you stuff so that was fun and nice.

Now to another busy week, and this weekend I will be administering a test at the school since S is with H again. I got my taxes done and found out that we owe teh state a bunch and getting even less than last year back from federal. It is all because of H and since I gave in to filing jointly again I lost a bunch, but oh well. Hopefully the D will be final soon...