Sage,
Please don't feel obligated. We all would want you to do what's best for YOU.

We do value your advise and insightfulness, but if it is detrimental to your healing then you need to think about it.

Sounds like that's what your doing.
It also sounds as though you get insecure sometimes which is totally normal after what you've been through.

I think it takes a LONG time to put the demons to rest.

Mattie has been reconciled to her H for some time and she still struggles with the memories sometimes.

Maybe she can help you with how to juggle this-she seems to be doing great in her M and still comes here to help people.

I know she cks on my thread regularly, so I'll ask her to ck yours out. She's very wise and her advise is invaluble to me.

I hope she can help you sort through this.
Glad you had a good trip, WELCOME BACK! Rachael

Rachael