I have been shooting messages to my wife about how she is doing. I guess I need to not check in with her, just do for me.
I agree. If your W is concerned about your mother, she will contact you or somebody in the family to see how things are going.
It is very, very easy for the LBS to find legit reasons to contact the WAS. You just have to keep yourself from doing it. Each time you resist the temptation to contact, that's a big step in detaching.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
