Remember also that the panic attacks and the depression are just feelings. They feel awful but they won't stop you from doing what you want to do unless you let them. You can feel the panic and depression and still do what you need to do and that is how you gain strength. I know b/c I did it. I suffer from panic attacks too. Don't anymore. They don't scare me. I know that they won't stop me from doing anything that I want to do.
As far as your financial future. Stop worrying. That is what I have learned to do. It is a mess for me as well. What can you do? Let each day come and survive it. Deal with the problem when it hits you head on. Don't anticipate it.
Again, I know exactly where you are coming from. I know how debillitating the anxiety and depression can be. I have felt exactly the way you felt. This is why I am so compelled to post b/c I know you don't HAVE to feel thisy way. You are at a fork and it is a choice. You can continue to feed these feelings or go the other direction and things WILL get better. Please sign up for the divorce care emails. They will help.
