...the teacher appears

[sage]

Hey guys...just doing a hit and run here...I'm trying to get to threads here and there but have to admit that I'm seriously overwhelmed with catching up!

Here's a universal thought for my DB pals:

HAPPY HOLIDAYS! A TOAST TO ALL OF YOU NEAR AND FAR!

Regardless of where one's sitch is, I think the "It's been a hell of a year" applies...I'm looking forward to the "newness" that 01/01/04 tends to bring in my mind...but I'm also trying to embrace that every day...regardless of the date.

I thought I would be able to spend more time on line pre-xmas but h's grandmother passed away so we've been spending more time with his family pre-holidays than expected. it HAS given me another opportunity to appreciate how THERE they are with each other...calm, loving, accepting....For the longest time I didn't recognize it because they weren't yelling their heads off!

We're doing well...I've been damn SAD lately...just the last few days in particular...to say that h has been wonderful (reassuring, supportive, loving) would be a dramatic understatement. I remain grateful for all of my blessings..and, of course, for finding DB when I did.

Special note to Michele: Thanks and happy holidays!

I'm not sure I'll be back before the 30th...I hope you all have wonderful holidays...wherever you are! I'm looking forward to catching up when I get back!

Sage

[holdingon]

Merry Christmas, Sage... and thank you for all of your "sage" advice!

[KutieKat]

didn't want you to think that ANYONE forgot about you - so just giving your thread a friendly little bump so everyone can say HEY to the most wise sage

kitti

[shinybear]

Funny, kk, the first person I thought of when I signed on today was Sage...frankly I wondered if she's perhaps outgrowing the bb...you know, the ultimate goal, when we don't really NEED to be around here anymore??

Is it wrong that this thought makes me a little sad, as well as happy?

Maybe they will have to start a new forum for veteran piecers...where we post updates and the little thangs that all M's go through!

Shiny

[psluke]

SHINY & SAGE,

Better neither one even consider leaving us!!!!!

[holdingon]

Sage has been in NYC and said she couldn't post until after 12/30... so we will all have to wait in anticipation!

[RMC]

I second that!
We get such wonderful insight from Sage's eloquent writing. She seems to put into words what we feel and it feels like, well, like someone is validating what we feel!

I'm very happy for the turn her M has taken.
I can only imagine what it's like to have my H say the the things Sage's does.

It serves to show us what CAN happen. She was down and out once too and can relate to everything we are going through.

I DO think there needs to be some kind of help for those of us in piecing when we are back together with our S and have to deal with a whole new set of fears and insecurities when the old feelings still don't go away just because our S comes back.

There is still some serious work to be done then.
I've been there. My H came home and left TWICE!

I know I did not handle myself as I would now, given time has passed and I've learned so much.
Still......I'm not sure things would have been any different.

I think the WAS needs to come to an awakening of what they really want and heartfelt remorse for what they've done before the M can thrive.

Sage, I hope your having a wonderful time, and please hurry back to us! Rachael

[Korms]

I'm right there with you RMC, my H is now coming home on 10 jan, well at least closer to home....staying wiht a friend until i agree to let him move back in.....I am terrified!!!

I just got used to the idea that it was over and now its not!

How to combat those fears?

Hope you all had a wonderful holiday!

Lee

[RMC]

Hi korms!

What do you think made your H turn around?

I know what you mean about getting used to living by yourself.
No eggshells is nice, but having a man there that loves you is even nicer.

How long was he gone? Rachael

[sage]

Hey friends! I'm back...mostly lurking as I try to catch up on ALL the ACTIVITY going on here! Yowza...miss a week or two and wonderful threads are popping up all over the place with tons and tons of responses! I'm gonna have to take a speed reading course!

I'll post more tomorrow...the short version: Holidays were wonderful...lots of together time with h...I've been feeling mighty blue, though...conjuring up some bad memories combined with the fears of opening my heart to h not AGAIN but perhaps for the first time, ever...h sensed my sadness...and we had an r talk the other day...it was SCARY for me but it helped us both to move some steps forward, I think. I'm feeling much calmer and the NY's goals (formerly known as resolutions!) are going really well!

Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts while I was gone...you all were in mine, too!

Sage