Hello and thank you for the very kind birthday wishes GAG, Seeking and Sanderika. My birthday was Monday. In answer to your question I had a lovely birthday GAG and I did do something for me. Last weekend my BFF and I went to a local mountain area for lunch and browsing at the shops; lots of jewellery and craft type shops. We had a lovely day. Then on Monday D and I had dinner with my parents which was as always, great. H text me and emailed birthday wishes but the dinner invitation didn't come until a few days later.
Before dinner update: I was thinking that if ow is still around and is still living locally H isn't too worried because my car would be in his driveway and it would be seen quite clearly from the main street.
H sent me a message to ask for my dinner request and I gave a suggestion since he asked but also said anything he prepared would be wonderful. I offered to bring food/wine and he said it wasn't necessary.
I went there about 10 mins late so that I didn't look too anxious. As D was there I didn't want to look too dressed up so i opted for smart casual and wore a black top that D had seen me wear but H hadn't. I chose to wear a ring and a bangle that belonged to his aunt before she passed away. I love them both and as the aunt was my age when she passed they are quite fitting. I had new perfume which I had been given for my birthday. So I guess I scrubbed up ok without being too formal. I didn't want to overdo it as H has been very casual in dress since ow.
Anyway on arrival, first thing I noticed was that H was dressed in a shirt the kids had given him for his birthday (I selected it). He looked more dressed than I have seen him in a while. The house looked as I remembered it and I noticed a water feature and a wall hanging which ow had given him were still in the same place so that was a clue of her ongoing existence. This didn't really surprise me but I did wonder why I had been invited. Cynicism did kick in but I let it go.
To begin, conversation was quite limited and I felt a little flat; I've had so much work lately and a big night out last night with friends for a hen's night so I was quite tired. I thought to myself, "This is hard work and I don't know if I can be bothered." Conversation was waning. Then something happened and conversation seemed to click and we were right; not flowing but comfortable enough.
H had some beautiful wine which he opened and when he went to pour again I stopped him as I had to drive but he suggested I could get a taxi rather than drive. (Hmmm, i thought, he's not worried if ow sees my car there all night) He offered to bring my car back in the morning for me. His house is not too far from mine.
Dinner Dinner was delicious and was the meal I had requested. H made a second meal of it for me to take with me as well. He checked to be sure I was enjoying my meal. He gave me a bottle of wine for a birthday gift as well....... very safe and impersonal but the first birthday gift since the birthday after he left.
Conversation Conversation during dinner was pleasant and really quite a cosy family situation. H asked after my family and a couple of friends and told me he had been in email contact with one of my brothers; the one he (and I) is closest to. He told me a few things about his family voluntarily (usually I have to ask after them). In the conversation there were a few little practical care indications like checking I had flood insurance and suggesting I was working too hard and to be careful with my health. Twice he randomly asked me if I was alright/ok throughout the evening. When he asked about work and I told him I was feeling quite tired and run down he said that he had noticed I was looking a little pale.
In the dining room I noticed a new photo frame with photos of the kids and H's family. No indications of photos of ow.
Post dinner After dinner I headed to the bathroom and D said she had to get something from her bedroom. She came out from her bedroom as I left the bathroom and whispered, " The portrait is gone!" Ow had had this tacky portrait done which she gave to H for his birthday a few years ago and it had been hanging in H's bedroom. D said the hook was still there but the portrait was not!
After dinner, H suggested a movie. He chose one that I had suggested when we were getting along well a few months back. He seemed quite relaxed.
H called the taxi when I indicated it was time to go......six hours after I had arrived. Unexpectedly, the taxi came really quickly so it was a quick departure. I kissed his cheek and said thanks, and he gave me a hug.
So, what's all this mean? Well ow is gone so this is something to celebrate!! Is there a replacement in the wings? Maybe....they say men never leave one without having another lined up but that wouldn't explain my invitation tonight.
Overall I would say H was quite comfortable and even though he had been up since 5am he was the one who suggested the movie at 9pm.
So the next step? Who knows! Tell me what you think. Do I just wait to see if he bothers to issue another invitation?
