The Lies and Deception Killing Me

[abbey1989]

Hi,
Is there any point in trying to rationalize H's behavior? Knowing that he has flat out LIED to me? Hard to go on pretending. I long for the days when I could tell H anything and everything I was thinking.

Now I just worry if I bring up OW he will clam up or get angry (although he isn't the yelling screaming type, he just ignores me and won't speak).

What an existence this is. Honestly, I am fairly certain this is not the first time he has had an A. When I was pregnant with my daughter, I am pretty certain he was carrying on with a gal who used to cut his hair.....and then while we were building our home 10 years ago......I think he may have had an A with a friend of mine. I started getting hang up calls all of the time. I suspected her because I had invited her over for dinner once our house was completed (she was/is single) and all of a sudden I noticed that they had disappeared. I walked outside and saw them walking down the hill hand in hand. H said he wanted to show her the view of our house from top of hill. RIGHT! That woman and I were pretty darn close. I just stopped calling her and she stopped calling me. OBVIOUS!

And now this.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I still have hope that the man I married has a conscience and that his heart will find his way back to me and our life together.

I know I may be delusional. As of right now....we are the most EXCELLENT roommates. We never fight, we enjoy some of the same passtimes, we love to be with all of our couple friends. We vacation as families. All in all....pretty nice life.

Except for the lying and cheating with the skanky divorcee home wrecker. UGH!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for listening.