My wife dropped the bomb on me on 2/10. She told me she no longer felt emotionally connected and needed to find herself. She went away for the following weekend to her sister's apartment. When she came back, I had already unwittingly started a 180 by just taking the position to listen and understand instead of trying to change her mind.
We went through 2 years of counseling starting about 3 years ago. It really seemed to help. It showed me a great love for her. However, we had been drifting a bit and I felt we needed to address it. I still felt as a result of counseling, we were in a better place than we ever had been in our marriage. That was before she dropped the bomb.
During the weekend she was away I discovered this Website. I considered signing up for the coaching the entire week. I was able to talk her into pursuing mediation in lieu of each of us hiring a lawyer. However, I am still quite frankly a little stunned and really need more time, though she is pressuring me to tell our son and get moving with a mediator. I did end up signing up with a coach and had my first session last week. I have read DR cover to cover, and I'm starting my second time through.
I am taking the Last Resort option. I am currently trying to Get a Life.
She did corner me last night and I ended up talking about the relationship, which was against my better judgment at this time. She is also suspicious about this counselor I found online (My DB coach), and I want to find the right way to tell her what I'm wanting to do without her feeling like I am trying to thwart her Great Escape Plan.
Ask your coach about how to approach your wife about possibly taking a session (if only for co-parenting issues). You are not doing anything wrong, you are talking to an expert to help you understand how your relationship got to this point and to be sure your child does well during this time. I wish you the best.
Karen, Resource Coordinator The Divorce Busting Center 303-444-7004 karen@divorcebusting.com
Give me a call if you'd like to schedule an appointment to speak with a Divorce Busting® Coach.
