Help!!! Newbie in a mess!

[Orchid37]

I am awake early again and then the first thought I had was "OMG, he is married" and that was the end of any peace.

I have no power left. Truthfully, haven't had any for awhile, but now it is so final. This is so unhealthy. The problem with this is that no matter what happens, I have no choice any longer. I hate that I can no longer hang on.

It makes me mad that he is forcing the situation to be over by making this impulsive decision. I mean, how can you marry someone after 3 weeks? How can you not tell your family? What kind of woman marries a man like that? Why did she have to be pregnant????

well... we are waiting for an answer to that question....It makes me angry that I was responsible and patient and was with him when he had nothing....went thru the initial yrs of starting adulthood with him....and he with me.......and yet, bam!

she has my dream - in 3 weeks - that I could not obtain in 6 yrs! Seems like fate!

I remember someone saying that I am waiting too long in the marriage to have children and maybe I did, but I didn't feel we were ready. And....well, apparently we were not - in that sense, I guess it is also a blessing. Sigh.

It feels like the end - sigh.