You can blame me anytime. It’s all laid out in my sitch for you to look at. I think overall you did a nice job here are the things that stand out to me
1. You tried the book. Good. It did not work. OK. She is not ready for that yet. The point is you tried during a time that the convo was lite and easy and that is the best time to test the waters. My W called yesterday. I thought she would want to read chapter two but immediately after talking with her just a few seconds I realized it was not the time to bring it up. So I didn’t. If you continue to have these types of convo’s you will have another chance.
2. You caught yourself making mistakes along the way. The important thing not that you made them they will happen it is that you caught it early and changed course.
3. Going for a walk together is a great idea. If I had this type of opportunity I would love it. It gives a chance to get out of the house and for her to do the same. You took a risk by asking her to come it paid off, you took a risk on the book, it did not pay off. What was it that I told you about earlier? Test, Evaluate……
4. Anytime you have an opportunity to keep the convo light and fun you are making progress. The fact that you were able to joke and have fun is big, now don’t get too comfortable with the exchange because it might be a little bit before you have one. My convo with W was about 15 minutes yesterday but that is ok, because ALL contact can be good contact if you chose it to be.
5. What you told her about the D is good. This is what I told my W “honey I don’t want the D. I think we can work things out, however if you think that the D is the only way to go and this is what you want, I will not stand in your way. Perhaps you are right maybe too much hurt has happened and we can’t fix it. I would like to try but if you don’t then go ahead and file. I will not facilitate it but I will support you” I let her know it was her decision not mine. You did something similar.
Overall very good job. At some point we have to test the waters but if the water is too hot you have to be ready to jump back out as quickly as you jumped in.
