LBS needing advice...

[glamgirl]

Wow, IB good for you to look internally. All I can suggest is to forgive yourself for what you know to be your part in the downfall of the marriage and then let it go. It's not worth beating yourself up over.

As I think you know my h returned. What he did tell me after his return was that this was NOT my fault. He said he was selfish and that he has to live with his mistakes the rest of his life.

Now, I had to take responsibility for what I know to be my part in the downfall of our marriage, but it was my h's choice to have an affair. One cannot control another, therefore don't take that burden on just let it go. We all have free will.

I also believe that my h was in some form of a crisis layered with a whole heap of depression on top of it. Not excusing my h for what he did, he was wrong but it helps with trying to understand why he would choose the path of destruction he did.

I don't come on the boards much anymore. Just trying to live my life. Sorry that your divorce is close. None of this is what we wanted. The road is even harder though if/when they return after much damage. You have been so strong, keep on that path and remember this was/is not your fault. God bless!