ugh... help me respond to this please

[what next?]

edited version:

Hey, are you going to send the accountant my W-2 as well? I'm assuming that anything else he would need from me is with you at this point. I'll call him this week, I just want to know what to tell him. Just let me know when you want to meet up at the tag agency.

The interview went really well I think. It was at Hilcorp Energy which looks like an awesome company to work for.

Slayde has to be the happiest baby I've ever been around. He smiles about everything and talks all the time but you can't understand hardly anything he says lol.

[2stepboogie]

I like it

[MrBond]

"The WAS will NEVER, NEVER apologize or regret leaving."

Not true. The WAS will apologize when they are truly ready to R. When they get to the point of remorse and not regret. Happens here and other places all the time. It's when they reach that moment of clarity that they apologize.

Not everyone gets to that point.

[MrBond]

"so when does it start to sink in for them that they have made a mistake?"

Your W didn't make a mistake. In fact, she'd already pushed you into the friend zone and you've been waiting for her to "see what she's been missing". Well she doesn't miss anything.

So here's the 2x4.

What is she really missing? You let it slide that you were willing to give up on the M by not talking to her initially and then giving her whatever she wants.

Start manning up.

Start with the ring. You told her that you wanted it back correct? But then she blatantly says that she's going to sell it.

Remind her of your agreement (even if there wasn't one, insist) and you decide what to do with it. Heck, tell her that you'd like to save it for someone special. Whatever.

As long as you continue to show her that you're a pushover, she's going to treat you as such. She doesn't respect you. Period.

Her asking how you're doing is her way of getting you to do what she wants. If she was really interested in what you were doing, she wouldn't be attaching statements like that at the end of a demand.

Tell her you'd like the ring back, then ignore her messages. Time to start getting your balls back from her.

End of 2x4.

[Redo]

"So here's the 2x4.

What is she really missing? You let it slide that you were willing to give up on the M by not talking to her initially and then giving her whatever she wants.

Sorry i dont meant to hijack from Next here, but Mr. Bond, what do you mean by this?

That when you first show your W that you can never be friends and then be friends with her?

[what next?]

Let me look at his packet & see what he requires, first. If it's pretty simple & he doesn't mind, I can send your stuff with mine.
I'm thinking the boxter title might take longer because we'll probably have to wait on the lien release even if I pay it off today (which I can't until I finish negotiating with IDS, at least). So, maybe we should go ahead and do it Thursday or Friday for the Durango and the quit deed. Can you come to the downtown tag agency? if not, I'll look at my calendar & figure out if i can come over to SS. Tag agencies always have notaries, right?

nephew looks like a happy baby. Wonder if it's nature or nurture? bil seems pretty laid back & sister has the training.

[what next?]

^^her reply to me today... again mentioning the selling of the ring even though I didn't bring it up in my reply

[what next?]

my tentative reply... thoughts?

No worries on the boxster title. I know where you live! lol

I wonder what time the tag agency closes by your house. They have a notary (I think they are all notaries) so that would be a good one if they are open late enough. They are also open on Saturdays until noon or so. If that doesn't work I can come downtown.

It's interesting to see the difference between Slayde and Blaize. Trina just got on lexapro too so that should help.

[MrBond]

See my earlier message.

[MrBond]

"Sorry i dont meant to hijack from Next here, but Mr. Bond, what do you mean by this?

That when you first show your W that you can never be friends and then be friends with her?"

No the thing is you need to be consistent in your actions whatever they may be. You don't need to "show" her anything. What do you want? If you want to fight for your M, then come up with a plan to do so and stick with it. But be sure it's YOUR plan.

If you give your spouse an inch, they will take a mile. Monitor the results. If what you're doing is driving them away, then do the opposite.

Bottom line is that there is no "strategy" or plan. It comes down to what you are willing to do and what you WANT to do. You can't control their actions, so you need to be comfortable with what you do. It may be dating other people or waiting around, or whatever. But whatever you do, make the actions consistent.