How long should you try? Until........

[MichelleLT]

IDK for sure about that 2 step. What do you expect her to say?
That lets get back together and work on our marriage? It seems to me that she is kind of throwing it out there and waiting for a reaction. Maybe she wants to see if you bit on this but to me it sounds like she is offering tidbits of hope to you. Whether this is on purpose or not, she may not even know.

Man 9 you are right on the money. I tell you, our expectations are our worse enemy. If we can control that we would all be in a much better place.

Here's your next step. BE THAT MAN! Be the guy she wants you to be. I KNOW you are, dude. I KNOW you can be that guy and ARE being that guy.

She needs affirmation that you love her no matter what she looks like, no matter what she does, no matter how she acts. My W is the same. She just wants to feel that she matters. Because you and her have that history, it is UBER important to her that she matters to YOU.

Bolt: You always lift my spirits. I almost feel bad for the 2x4 I posted on your thread but I did it out of love. You know that. I learn from you all the time I sometimes I feel like she is giving me bread crumbs to follow. I just have to stop looking for the loaf and start enjoying the crumbs more. It is better than leaving me coal!

You can control your expectations. By noticing when you have them, and then working to overcome them. You are still struggling with your expectation that somehow everything will just go to reconciliation and bliss, but you are at least aware of it. It's important that you aren't too eager right now. You have built a solid foundation of friendship and are trying to navigate to romance. Don't push too fast. Be patient. Time is on your side.

Actions are much more important than words right now. On both sides.

Enjoy the bread crumbs. There might be a gingerbread cottage at the end for you.