Me – soon to be divorced, well educated, good job, homeowner, wordly, stable. Athletic. Lots of good friends. A “Nice Guy”.
Her - Super nice. Cute, if not hot. A few years my jr. Actively looking. Makes much less $$ than I.
The money/education stuff is relevant because I want to paint the picture of us being in slightly different socio/economic positions.
After our third or fourth date, she emails me and tells me “I’m just trying to go with my gut, and I’m just not feeling what I should be. Can we be friends?”. I reply yes, of course, you are a friend and you have to do what you feel is right. I mean this. I don’t want to force anything.
We keep chatting, hanging out over the intervening weeks. Friday night a bunch of people get together and we go out as a group. She texts me that she hopes I go. After going out, she texts me again, saying it was nice to see me and I reply lets have breakfast tomorrow.
On Sat. we had a great “date”. Both of us expected to just have breakfast together. We ended up spending the whole day with each other and we both had a great time; mostly just hanging out at my house. But we got close, took a nap together, snuggled a bit and had a “ titillating” conversation that hinted at things to come, soon, but not just yet.
We went for a walk and she starts telling my why she said she didn’t want to date. Basically it comes down to me not being “dangerous” enough. She said if I had a tattoo or something she’d probably be all over me. On several occasions she said “but I’m working on this and I think I can get over it.”
So my question, mostly to the women out there: Can a woman “get over” the attraction to dangerous guys? Things are going well, and I'm trying not to be anything but myself. What I don’t want is to date for 3 months, get close, and then she gets bored because I’m not dangerous enough. I understand the idea of attraction to dangerous guys, but does it go away?
M:37 W:34 M:4 years T:6 years No Kids A disclosed - 9/1/2010 W asks for separation - 10/19/2010 Moving on - 10/24/2010 A ends (and I believe her) - 12/2010 Content - 3/1/2011 Served - 3/18/2011 D Day - 6/20/2011
