I think after three months of hell, my seratonin levels are finally coming into balance. Haven't "felt" depressed or angry for a few days now. Oh, don't get me wrong, certain thoughts still creep into my mind from time to time, especially on rainy days, but I get them under control more easily now. Trusty guitar and march madness helps. And I went to daily mass Friday.
Interesting thing happened this weekend. There was a dinner theatre/talent show at our church Fri & Sat nite which I participated in. W and kids didn't want to have anything to do with it, cause they're alredy heavily involved with drama stuff at school.
Anyway, I was having a blast at dinner w/friends and fellow players (but my skit wasn't until almost two hours into the show) when guess who comes in for dinner? W's "confidant" from work and her family. I greeted her H and eldest D on the way to the bar, but couldn't bring myself to travel across the room to say "hi" to confidant. Still, I am glad she caught my skit and saw me having such a fun time. By the time we took the stage our whole troupe was a 12 pack in and totally hammered.
I didn't feel like mentioning any of this to W. Yesterday afternoon W seemed softer; we discussed running down our lists of household bills and just divying things up to cut down on the atty involvement/fees. We talked about my refinancing the house I explained that I couldn't do it without 80/20 loan to value. It was all civil.
She really does look a mess though when I get a good look at her face. I think this whole thing's just tearing her apart. But I simply can't imagine. Soon she's going to realze that once the property is in my name, and she has her half of the equity in her pocket, there's nothing to stop her from leaving. Will she stay for S12? I don't know and I don't really care.
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."
