Brian: sorry to task this. Hope i am not intruding too much.
So you play a lot of games. But you also mentioned that you guys made love after 1 year?
Is there a reason why your sex life was down? You also mentioned that both of you were depressed. Any reason?
Thats because i dont think your wife decided to leave just because of your video game addiction. Maybe there's something else underneath that was eating the relationship.
See I had a horrible addiction to hobbies. I had tons of hobbies. R/C, metalworking, woodworking, model trains, you name it. But underneath i was depressed. Depressed that our relationship was going down the drain. I did not actively try to improve the relationship. Now my wife did hate me having all these hobbies. When she left i wondered if my hobbies were a reason. In a way they were a reason. Hobbies kept me from working on my relationship.
So it would be good to analyze to see if there was something else that could a big reason for your wife walking out.
Karma,
Early on in our marriage, I played WoW ALL the time. When I finally quit that, I played other things. I know it hurt her that I chose the games over her. "It is such a terrible feeling to feel alone even while sitting next to your husband." It took me a long time to understand what she meant by that. ALL my games are gone for good.
Before February, we had sex maybe 3 times in 4-5 years. Why you ask? I am on Zoloft for anxiety..it desensitises you down there. After reading the DB book, obviously, I was depressed and that didn't help matters in that area. I am also overweight and I'm sure that was partly to blame on my side. But the WORST reason was my pride. There were so many nights that I would just look at her and want to touch her but just never asked (or acted). I don't know why either. My wife is beautiful. She would never have turned sex down. I am just an idiot!!
As far as our depression is concerned..my wife was depressed because she wasn't getting the support (emotional or physical) she needed from me for so many years. I never opened up and shared my feelings...That is a serious problem with me. I don't know how to speak what I feel. So after years of all of this, feeling alone, she grew depressed. I grew depressed because I knew there was something wrong but didn't know what to do.
Games weren't the only reason she left. It was everything. My lack of respect for her. I would say things that you would never say to the one you love. I never raised a finger to help her with the house, yard, dogs, finances, etc. She ran the household. I just brought in a large check every two weeks. I was selfish and lazy. I didn't give her the attention she needed. Whenever we had a disagreement, I was always right...ALWAYS. I never apologized for my actions or words. I could go on and on...I know what I have done to this relationship. I know need to continue my 180 lifestyle change and keep it permanent.
