I need to take that very step - I need to CHOOSE to believe that my H is in crisis and possibly even mentally ill. I feel as though for the longest time I have been trying to be compassionate and forgiving. I would say that the strongest need I have had over the last few months was to detach which for me meant no contact. This did not endear me to him but I believe to this day that the closer I stood to the illness or the poison the less able I would have been to survive.
Today I feel maybe I am getting strong enough to have a conversation with him. Problem is I am also beginning to let myself feel more anger. I want to avoid this "perfect storm" - so I am not quite sure where I will go from here.
Thanks for your words of wisdom - I will take heed!
M-48/XH-48 M=25/T=28 years Ds-24,22/S-18 D - 3/11 A Day at a Time
