My wife brings her father to the house to load stuff up. He stays outside. My wife had made the decision to break contact with her parents from the year we were married, so I haven't seen my father-in-law for 6 years. I was ready to face my demons because he probably wanted to kill me for hurting his daughter.
I had been vacuuming a carpet earlier and the vacuum was sitting out. My wife sees it and says I need to use that. I asked if she was going to return it tomorrow or something because I needed to clean the place up (due to the mess she left behind). She indicated that she's keeping it. I was, like, WHAT?
That started the whole ball rolling about why I thought it was not okay to take things she wants to take. I said it's not that I want the vacuum, it's the principle of it. Then my wife said that everyone, including her dad, said she was too nice in leaving things behind for me. They said she should've wiped me clean because they felt that I had mooched off her loan money while hurting her with porn.
I asked her if she and they are focused on the money-mooching aspect now, rather than dealing with what caused our marital problems, i.e. porn and lies? She said they're all part of it, to which I said the root cause was my porn addiction - not money, not laziness or whatever, or are you telling me you're reneging on agreeing to take out some loans to help us through the earlier part of our marriage? Then my wife said she knows I'm not over it (porn). I said I never was, then she interrupted: "You always said you're over it, but you never are. You want me to remain in a marriage where I'm unhappy and miserable?" I said again, "I have told you I never was over it....I still fight it, I still have temptations, but I know how to control them."
That was pretty much it...she was upset and crying a little. At one point she stood in front of my crying and I asked if she wanted a hug. She said she just wants to get away from me. Later I helped moved her office desk with her. And then she and her dad drove away without letting me say goodbye or goodnight to our son. I called her and left a message that I was surprised that they left without letting me say bye to 'E'. Please tell him goodnight for me and give him a kiss for me too, I added.
