I can totally empathize with where you're at right now, so maybe this will help...
In my situation, anytime I don't like the way that I am feeling, and do my best to be objective and really listen to what my feelings are communicating.
It's difficult sometimes to really trust and listen to our bodies, but I find if I just lie down, relax, tune in to the feeling, and patiently wait for some kind of indication, more often than not I can finally hear what my body has to say.
I lie still, trying to pinpoint where the feeling is, I bring my full attention to it and then ask something like "What's the message here? What is this feeling really trying to tell me?"
When I see, hear or recognize that I have feelings I don't like, simply by acknowledging them and giving them space to speak, it's like I am validating my own self-worth, and that invariably starts making me feel better.
Once I'm feeling a little better - more confidence, more dignity, more self-respect, generally just feeling a little better - then I can begin to ask myself what I feel that I deserve.
A guy once told me that if you want to know what people think, listen to what they say.
But if you want to know what they believe, look at what they do.
People often kid themselves. They think they truly deserve better, but their actions show otherwise.
Only you can know your limits. Only you can set your standards.
But I do know that anyone who has consistently demonstrated the levels of love, integrity and commitment that is apparent in your posts, deserves to feel good about herself, deserves to have her needs fulfilled, deserves to be happy, and deserves to have an extraordinary quality of life.
Right now I'm just some guy sitting at his computer, but I want to know that I really appreciate your contributions here and I think you're an amazing person.
I am being the possibility of:
1) Integrity 2) Loving myself completely. 3) Things flowing naturally between us, without any fear or attachment to the outcome.
