Good points. Had that conversation with W - explained that she gave me her phone and I noticed the subject line of that message. She claimed boss was with a group of people and that this is an office joke. Hey, maybe that's true, though it does explain everthing away. I told her that I was glad to hear that because if it really was a private intimate message, as it seemed, I would be having a serious talk with her boss, and that I would make sure it was in a rather public place.
My guess is that this is on the verge of somesort of A - maybe it is already, though they'd have to have been pretty creative about it to get time together outside of work. Or, maybe they are just unusally good platonic friends. (ha!) Either way I have some time, and I want to use it to address Sandi2s points.
In the past couple of weeks I've made a point to spend some time with my guy friends and my brother, made some important decisions that have been hanging over my head, reclaimed some time for myself, and am putting my life back together. I also told my wife to go on her company trip to Europe - as a sign that I was no going to be weak, whinny, and jealous of her coworkers. (boss' wife is going as a part of a large group, so I doubt anything would happen while they are away for a week). I've realized that I probably can't just suddenly change this behavior unless I really change my environment - I'm waking up early, getting support from friends, keeping busy, and just basically getting things together.
Yes, that sinking feeling is probably the saem I encountered as a boy. I think that's how it works. Honestly, once someone is beaten down, really beaten down, the bullies know they "have" him - one sort of gives up when faced with conflict. Climbing out of that hole is my purpose in life now. I'm trying to find things where I can get that feeling of winning - back playing volleyball and running, thinking of running a half marathon this spring. And I'm working with my Ss to make sure they don't have the same experiences I did.
Thanks for the butt-kicking support. Exactly what I needed to start making some changes....
